Thursday, June 30, 2011

The Rite of Spring

I'm a huge fan of the How Stuff Works podcast, Stuff You Missed in History Class. I am also a big fan of Igor Stravinsky and his 1913 ballet, The Rite of Spring. (For those Disney kids, the Dinosaur bit from Fantasia).

So when the podcast put out an episode about the riot that occurred during the ballet's opening night, I got pretty excited. The music was strange, the costumes were unorthodox, and the dancing was primitive and "vulgar." Love it.

The costumes, set design, and choreography were lost for decades until some dance and art historians were able to piece the performance together in the late 1980s. Luckily, PBS made a special! And it's on Youtube!

It's around 30 minutes long all together, but if you want to watch something truly strange yet amazing, it's posted after the break.

Friday, June 24, 2011

Tapfish

Why yes, every morning before work I take care of my electronic fish. I admit this, I don't care. I love my fishtanks full of happy clownfish, gigantic lionfish, and fun decorative treasure chests.

Plus I'm obsessed with levelling up to unlock new fish and decorations. And did I mention the trophies for making all kinds of weird combinations? Skinner Box? Is that the correct term?

Anyway, Tapfish is available free through the Android marketplace. Looks like it's on IOS as well.

And if you too play the Tapfish on the Android, friend me. Name's Byelka.

Holy crap there are other Tap animals too.

Damn, appears on Tap Ranch is on Android so far. Tap Bird. Port it over Gameview. I want that now.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

License to Pawn

In the absence of summer scripted television I've begun watching a lot of strange reality-type shows on History, TLC, A&E and the likes. Including Pawn Stars, which, according to commercials, is the most watched reality show on cable. Or something like that.

I want to be his friend.
I love that show. I love all the weird facts, the strange people, the crushing disappointment in finding out your super-rare-it-was-$20,000-on-eBay item is a total and complete fake. Amazing.

And now there is a book!

License to Pawn is part memoir, part behind the scenes, part weird facts and stories. Most of the book is told from Rick's perspective, though the other three stars of the show are each given a chapter apiece. Because of that, there is some repetitive and duplicated information. It's not anything masterfully written, and the book goes off on a bunch of tangents (but I can't really blame them for that), but overall I really enjoyed it.

It was interesting getting some background on the people you see on TV; who they are, how they got into the business. (And how they seem to know so darned much)

If you're looking for a quick, but thoroughly entertaining read (I honestly don't think I've read a book that fast since I powered the Hunger Games trilogy in a weekend) pick this up.

And hey.. now I know even more useless information!

Lane Switching and You : A Driving Primer

I make the Chicago to Milwaukee trek at least twice a month, and every damn time I witness the same type of driving stupidity.

When riding I-90/94 heading out of the city, you will encounter a split, a choice of directions. Left is O'Hare Airport, right is Milwaukee.

They start warning you of this impending split two miles in advance. With huge green signs. Left three lanes go to O'Hare, right to Milwaukee. For two miles.

Yet every single time I run in to this -

Marvel at my arts talents

Really... REALLY?! Was smacking your signal and switching lanes just sooo difficult that you couldn't do it with two miles worth of warnings? And while yes, their are on-ramps within those two miles, keep in mind that traffic is going all of 30mph. It's not that hard to move over a few lanes in a half-mile distance. And it's usually not those people causing the problems anyway, it's morons who ride in the 4th lane from the left until the last available second before their brain thinks "Oh shit, maybe I should get into the third lane from the left!!!!"

Ugh. It's like the people who see "lane closing 1000 feet" signs, and then ride it till the last possible second before either nearly hitting another car, or plowing into the orange construction barrels. Believe it or not, the warnings can help you not look like a complete idiot.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Green Lantern

So yesterday my brother gets on my case to go see Green Lantern. Such a suggestion is not out of the ordinary, we do see a lot of superhero/fantasy/sci-fi related films, but I was hesitant regarding this one.

I am an avid reader and adherent of the Rotten Tomatoes film rankings. At the time of viewing suggestion, The Green Lantern was hovering somewhere around 24%. Not. Stellar.

How many times can you use a ring
before recharging it? An hour? Seven?
Thirteen trips back and forth to
lantern planet?
But I caved, and we saw it. I love Ryan Reynolds and his weirdness, and I will proudly admit that I watch Gossip Girl, staring the film's leading lady- Blake Lively. So alright, I went for the cast at least.

It was.... meh. I suppose better than I expected, knowing it had a whopping 24% (which is only about half the number that freaking Mr. Popper's Penguins has, and Newberry-award-wining children's book or not, that film looks like a stinker).

As far as superhero films go this year, X-Men First Class has been my favorite. Followed by Thor. Have there been any others? My memory is failing me a bit here. Green Lantern was only so/so. The CGI seemed a bit wonky in places, and the story wasn't all that exciting, or funny. I yawned. A lot.

I suppose my biggest issue with Green Lantern was that one of the plots, the one with Hector and the totally cliche "hot girl likes the hot guy and not me, the brilliant nerd whaa whaaa and my daddy hates me tooo" deal. I admit, I have never read the source comics, but it seemed to me that that entire subplot couldn't been abandoned and the story would've remained relatively unchanged. Parallax still would've hated Hal, because he had the purple guy's ring, and he still would've come to earth with or without giant-brain-secondary-villain-man.

Do all superhero movies have to have like multiple villains now? Can't just one be enough? Yes, I know that Batman Begins  and The Dark Knight had two apiece, but in some situations wouldn't one just be enough? In this case that second story wasn't even remotely interesting to me.

At least the film dealt with the whole "tiny little mask is a disguise!" issue. I would've been sorely upset if the girl who knew him from childhood couldn't recognize him from behind a tiny mask that covers his cheekbones. Cause that's just stupid.

So in recap. Green Lantern = ehhhh. It wasn't walk-out of the theater bad, or totally fall asleep bad. But not a great film, and certainly no where near the best comic book film of the year.

Game of Thrones Season 1

Well HBO's Game of Thrones ended last night in spectacular fashion. As a huge fan of the books I was incredibly pleased by the television adaptation. The casting (in most cases) was spot on, the scenes were faithfully adapted and interpretative, and it really captured the "anything goes/shit is gonna go down" essence of the books.

NOW. If you haven't read all of the books, please do not continue reading my completely unorganized bullet points. I assure you that I will be spoilering the crap out of things. You've been warned.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

The Annoyances of Moving

Since 2004 I've lived in seven different buildings, in four different cities, in three different states. I hate moving. Thanks college.

And now I'm moving again, to city #5, which is in a different state from city #4, but at least it's close enough to not be completely frustrating. Plus my parents live near the new place, so I can take crap up to their place when I visit. And I'll be paying for two apartments during July, just to give me some time to move and transition and clean. Smooth sailing, right?

No. I am not on a fun boat with T-Pain. Fail.

Wrong. See, it would be great if it wasn't for my landlord/management company. I tell them I'm moving. I even given them the date that the truck is coming in (which is a full four weeks before the lease ends). I assure them that we will be completely moved and cleaned up with at least two weeks to go on the lease.

Then, they say that I should try and "move faster" so that they can come in an take pictures of the place for advertising. They say this when I have seven weeks left on my lease. Seven weeks and you want me to move faster? And this is right after they make sure I'm still going to pay them for July. Freaking of course I will, didn't I just say I'd still be there at least two weeks into the month?

So OK, I get some stuff up to my parent's house, take my own pictures, now I hope they'll get off my case.

Oh no! Someone shows up to look at the place yesterday, I had no advance warning of this. I had a missed call a few days back from a local area code, but there was no message. Was I supposed to be psychic and deduce exactly the moment these people were coming by? Was I suppose to call back this mystery phone number that had left no message? Hell no, I never do that. If I don't know you, and you don't leave a message, I write it off as a wrong number, because for some reason I get loads of those.

And better yet, the guy showing the apartment seemed confused when I said the lease ended July 31st. I really hope he's just confused (there is at least one other unit in the building currently being shown) because otherwise my landlord is apparently trying to rent this place while all of my furniture is still there with a month left on my stinking lease.

Moving is the best.

Whatever, I'm going to go back to listing to Samuel Barber's Adagio for Strings. Which, by the way, is the exact opposite of I'm on a Boat, as it is considered The Saddest Song Ever Written. But that's a tangent for another day.

Comic-Con 2011

Comic-Con 2011: HBO Announces GAME OF THRONES and TRUE BLOOD Panels

I'll make it to Comic Con one of these days. And I'd kill to go to either of those panels.

I'm a massive fan of Game of Thrones, and the entire Song of Ice and Fire series by George R.R. Martin. (And in a few weeks I guarantee there will be lots of rambling about Dance with Dragons).

And True Blood ain't too bad either. Believe me, I'm not really a Vampire person, but I'm getting insanely pumped for the new season, especially since summer has a bit of a television drought.

I think I'll need to mark a date on my calendar sometime around mid-December. Buy Comic Con tickets. They always sell out so quickly.

Friday, June 17, 2011

LOL Vancouver

Eulogy: Remembering the 2010-11 Vancouver Canucks

I don't even know what I can add to this. It is amazing in every way.

ESPN Magazine's Ultimate Standings

For nine years ESPN Magazine has been releasing an "Ultimate Standings" list that ranks every team in the MLB, NHL, NBA, and NFL. This gigantic super-chart bases it's decision on eight different categories: Bang for the Buck, Fan Relations, Ownership, Affordability, Stadium Experience, Players, Coaching, and Title Track.

So now I'm going to gloat.

#1 overall? Green Bay Packers. 
And how could they be anything but? The reigning Super Bowl champions have spectacular players and a near legendary stadium experience. And if you aren't convinced of the current greatness of Aaron Rodgers, just give this article a read.

#30 overall and #8 MLB Team? Milwaukee Brewers. If only they had more "Title Track" potential. But hey, having one of the highest stadium experiences in all sports is pretty spectacular. And as of this typing, they are #1 in the NL Central. High five boys. (Though yesterdays 12-7 loss to the Cubs was pretty heartbreaking).

And Speaking of the Cubs? #112 overall. Out of 122. Hah.
Yeah, we all have those teams we just don't like. Minnesota Vikings - #106. Chicago Bears -  #74. New York Yankees - #75 (with one of the worst affordability ratings out there). Vancouver Canucks - #43... which isn't awful but worse than than the Hawks at least. If only my beloved Blackhawks were more affordable. #36 overall, with insanely expensive ticket prices.

I don't follow the NBA even remotely, but I'm not shocked at the horrible placement of the Milwaukee Bucks. The Bradley Center is pretty gross.

101 Gadgets That Changed the World

This past Wednesday, History aired a two hour special titled 101 Gadgets That Changed the World. This list, first compiled by Popular Mechanics magazine, includes hundreds of years worth of items that have changed the way we live.

Many objects relate to a similar format or type, like media devices. Cassette tapes, DVDs, CDs, CD-ROMs, Floppy Discs, and Flash Drives all made the list in various locations. Similarly, phonographs, radios, transistor radios, Walkmans, and MP3 players are all in there as well. And that is all great and good; different formats are innovative and world changing for a myriad of reasons. The jump from a 3.5" diskette to a CD-ROM was a huge one that had gigantic implications for the way we store and exchange data. And likewise the jump to Flash Drives led to the dawn of even greater abilities to store, move, and retrieve.. sometimes even for nefarious purposes ala Stuxnet.

But... like any massive countdown list I have some issues with a few of their choices. A tagline of the program is that these are technologies that we can't imagine living without. Yet the light bulb, and invention that literally changed the way we work and live, was only #10. The dry cell battery, an object that powers more devices than I can even fathom to count? #11. Or what about the hypodermic needle? A medical gadget that is repoinsible for saving millions of lives? #4.

And what, pray tell, could possibly be more important than those three things?



A smart phone. Really.

Now, their rationale is that this gadget combines at least 12 other gadgets, including the MP3 player, alarm clock, GPS navigator, and television. Maybe my entire perception of this list is completely off, but if every smartphone on the planet magically evaporated, we'd still have all of those individual gadgets. Yes, it would be more inconvenient to have separate alarm clocks and MP3 players... oh wait. Most people do anyway.

Don't get me wrong, I adore my HTC Evo, I use it constantly. But if I had to chose between no phone, or having no light bulbs, batteries, or hypodermic needles, it wouldn't even be a question. The smartphone has definitely been a life altering device, but to me it's certainly not the greatest or most important gadget ever made.

But no one ever 100% agrees with these lists anyway. Like "Welcome to the Jungle" as VH1s greatest hard rock song of all time? Pssh.

Anyway, it appears that History will be replaying the special this Saturday (June 18th). Check out their show site at http://www.history.com/shows/101-gadgets-that-changed-the-world, or Popular Mechanics page at http://www.popularmechanics.com/technology/gadgets/reviews/101-gadgets-that-changed-the-world#fbIndex1