The Bird Wall

Before moving, I was inspired by post on Apartment Therapy, "How to Create a Salon-Style Wall." Well now, two months in to the new place, I've created one of my very own. 

My initial plan was to get all kinda of crazy jumbled frames... but Goodwill ended up being disappointing and actual assorted frames are rather expensive. But you know what are cheap? Plain colored frames from Ikea. I think I was able to get my whole mess of frames for about $35. (Don't quote me on that, I bought them in multiple trips and picked up some of the 5x7's at Target also)

Anyway, I decided to go with a theme. Birds. Obviously. I bought some actual prints and art cards while at the National Gallery in DC. Then supplemented those with some fancy photo-paper images off the internet. I'm a fan of the natural history "classics" like Audubon and John Gould, so a bunch of those ended up in there. 

I still have a few patches to fill in, and some more to add in general, but I ran out of frames. (Another Ikea trip will happen at some point in the next few weeks) I also need to actually find a leveler so things look more straight. 

Oh, and I mounted it all using 3M Picture hangers. They are basically velcro strips that you slap on the wall, then on the frame. Keeps the walls from being destroyed by nails (a good thing when you are renting) and lets you move and adjust pretty easily.

Moving Woes, cont.

I've not been writing much, but that's primarily because I was in the process of moving, didn't have internet, and didn't really have a whole mess of time to do anything other than unpack.

But now most of that is complete, except for a jaunt back to Chicago to clean the old place up and get the few remaining bits and pieces out.

Unfortunately the management, and all of the stupid companies they've contracted to show the place, are being indescribably annoying.

For instance: I was always under the impression that you needed to give 24 hours before entering an apartment. Apparently not so for my place! Since they began showing it around a month ago I've gotten maybe 5 or 6 "courtesy calls" that were more than a day in advance. Usually it's around 2 hours. Or, in the case of the last night, 15 freaking minutes.

While I could just say no, I think it would drive me even more insane. It's not just one company, it's 4 or 5. ALL of them pull this garbage.

And we haven't even gotten to my management company itself. I moved two hours away, I can't just drive back there whenever it tickles my fancy. When trying to find out where I should turn in my keys, I was told that I need to schedule a checkout appointment. You know, the time where they go through your empty place to assess crap for the security deposit return? They want me to be there for that. Why? I've lived in a lot of different apartments, and have never once been required to schedule a check out appointment, is this practice normal?

Oh, and if they can't come on Sunday, I'll have to drive back down there yet again for what I'm sure will amount to a twenty minute awkward walkthrough. I just want to be done with those assholes forever.

The Rite of Spring

I'm a huge fan of the How Stuff Works podcast, Stuff You Missed in History Class. I am also a big fan of Igor Stravinsky and his 1913 ballet, The Rite of Spring. (For those Disney kids, the Dinosaur bit from Fantasia).

So when the podcast put out an episode about the riot that occurred during the ballet's opening night, I got pretty excited. The music was strange, the costumes were unorthodox, and the dancing was primitive and "vulgar." Love it.

The costumes, set design, and choreography were lost for decades until some dance and art historians were able to piece the performance together in the late 1980s. Luckily, PBS made a special! And it's on Youtube!

It's around 30 minutes long all together, but if you want to watch something truly strange yet amazing, it's posted after the break.

Tapfish

Why yes, every morning before work I take care of my electronic fish. I admit this, I don't care. I love my fishtanks full of happy clownfish, gigantic lionfish, and fun decorative treasure chests.

Plus I'm obsessed with levelling up to unlock new fish and decorations. And did I mention the trophies for making all kinds of weird combinations? Skinner Box? Is that the correct term?

Anyway, Tapfish is available free through the Android marketplace. Looks like it's on IOS as well.

And if you too play the Tapfish on the Android, friend me. Name's Byelka.

Holy crap there are other Tap animals too.

Damn, appears on Tap Ranch is on Android so far. Tap Bird. Port it over Gameview. I want that now.

License to Pawn

In the absence of summer scripted television I've begun watching a lot of strange reality-type shows on History, TLC, A&E and the likes. Including Pawn Stars, which, according to commercials, is the most watched reality show on cable. Or something like that.

I want to be his friend.

I love that show. I love all the weird facts, the strange people, the crushing disappointment in finding out your super-rare-it-was-$20,000-on-eBay item is a total and complete fake. Amazing.

And now there is a book!

License to Pawn is part memoir, part behind the scenes, part weird facts and stories. Most of the book is told from Rick's perspective, though the other three stars of the show are each given a chapter apiece. Because of that, there is some repetitive and duplicated information. It's not anything masterfully written, and the book goes off on a bunch of tangents (but I can't really blame them for that), but overall I really enjoyed it.

It was interesting getting some background on the people you see on TV; who they are, how they got into the business. (And how they seem to know so darned much)

If you're looking for a quick, but thoroughly entertaining read (I honestly don't think I've read a book that fast since I powered the Hunger Games trilogy in a weekend) pick this up.

And hey.. now I know even more useless information!

Lane Switching and You : A Driving Primer

I make the Chicago to Milwaukee trek at least twice a month, and every damn time I witness the same type of driving stupidity.

When riding I-90/94 heading out of the city, you will encounter a split, a choice of directions. Left is O'Hare Airport, right is Milwaukee.

They start warning you of this impending split two miles in advance. With huge green signs. Left three lanes go to O'Hare, right to Milwaukee. For two miles.

Yet every single time I run in to this -

Marvel at my arts talents

Really... REALLY?! Was smacking your signal and switching lanes just sooo difficult that you couldn't do it with two miles worth of warnings? And while yes, their are on-ramps within those two miles, keep in mind that traffic is going all of 30mph. It's not that hard to move over a few lanes in a half-mile distance. And it's usually not those people causing the problems anyway, it's morons who ride in the 4th lane from the left until the last available second before their brain thinks "Oh shit, maybe I should get into the third lane from the left!!!!"

Ugh. It's like the people who see "lane closing 1000 feet" signs, and then ride it till the last possible second before either nearly hitting another car, or plowing into the orange construction barrels. Believe it or not, the warnings can help you not look like a complete idiot.

Green Lantern

So yesterday my brother gets on my case to go see Green Lantern. Such a suggestion is not out of the ordinary, we do see a lot of superhero/fantasy/sci-fi related films, but I was hesitant regarding this one.

I am an avid reader and adherent of the Rotten Tomatoes film rankings. At the time of viewing suggestion, The Green Lantern was hovering somewhere around 24%. Not. Stellar.

How many times can you use a ring
before recharging it? An hour? Seven?
Thirteen trips back and forth to
lantern planet?

But I caved, and we saw it. I love Ryan Reynolds and his weirdness, and I will proudly admit that I watch Gossip Girl, staring the film's leading lady- Blake Lively. So alright, I went for the cast at least.

It was.... meh. I suppose better than I expected, knowing it had a whopping 24% (which is only about half the number that freaking Mr. Popper's Penguins has, and Newberry-award-wining children's book or not, that film looks like a stinker).

As far as superhero films go this year, X-Men First Class has been my favorite. Followed by Thor. Have there been any others? My memory is failing me a bit here. Green Lantern was only so/so. The CGI seemed a bit wonky in places, and the story wasn't all that exciting, or funny. I yawned. A lot.

I suppose my biggest issue with Green Lantern was that one of the plots, the one with Hector and the totally cliche "hot girl likes the hot guy and not me, the brilliant nerd whaa whaaa and my daddy hates me tooo" deal. I admit, I have never read the source comics, but it seemed to me that that entire subplot couldn't been abandoned and the story would've remained relatively unchanged. Parallax still would've hated Hal, because he had the purple guy's ring, and he still would've come to earth with or without giant-brain-secondary-villain-man.

Do all superhero movies have to have like multiple villains now? Can't just one be enough? Yes, I know that Batman Begins  and The Dark Knight had two apiece, but in some situations wouldn't one just be enough? In this case that second story wasn't even remotely interesting to me.

At least the film dealt with the whole "tiny little mask is a disguise!" issue. I would've been sorely upset if the girl who knew him from childhood couldn't recognize him from behind a tiny mask that covers his cheekbones. Cause that's just stupid.

So in recap. Green Lantern = ehhhh. It wasn't walk-out of the theater bad, or totally fall asleep bad. But not a great film, and certainly no where near the best comic book film of the year.